The Un-Hostile Hostel: Five (Cheap to Free) Hosting Tips

By Lev Novak

Once you have your awesome apartment, chances are you’re going to have someone over. Friends are going to hop in and out, and some will even spend the night. So how do you prepare yourself as a hosting house? Read on, my friend.

1. Where Are They Going To Sleep?

This is the biggest concern of any time I’ve been a host or hosted. How, quite simply, am I (or the other person) going to sleep?

This, fortunately, can easily be solved. Go right now and try to sleep on your couch. Seriously, give it a shot. Some of the couches you have *are* good, and good enough to crash on, but the problem is everyone acts like their couch is good enough: “you can crash on the couch” turns into a crap-shoot, and a bean-bag chair is for passing out in, not for, you know, actual sleep.

Instead of that, get an air mattress. It’s cheap, portable, and a total pro move. Everyone’s going to be super grateful, and you can even lend it out when you don’t have guests. Plus, in a pinch, it might come in handy for yourself.

The next best thing is a forgotten great: the sleeping bag. A good (or decent) sleeping bag, especially on a carpeted floor is a lot better than a tiny couch.

The last thing is to check climate: are the windows open in the living room, forcing the guy up at the crack of dawn? Close the blinds. Is it way too hot and the summer, and your room has AC? Let them sleep on your floor. These are the things that you forget as a host but you suffer through as a guest.

2. Prepare Distraction

As a general rule, guests wake up before their hosts. Don’t worry about that- you deserve to sleep in. But it’s a good host move to have something available for your guest while you sleep in your cozy, real-person bed. If you have granola bars or yogurt (two college staples for breakfast and otherwise) tell them in advance. Give them your wireless password before bed so they can goof off in the morning for you to wake up. That’s all you need to do: with these little gifts, your guest should be content all morning.

3. Know The Plan

Why is your guest here? Are they an old friend from high-school? Someone you just met last night? A tangental friend who needs to search for an apartment in your city? Who your guest is alters your requirements as a host. For an old friend, you need a plan to entertain them: they’re here to visit you, after all. If it was someone you met last need, you need to be cordial and have hang-over prep ready for them, in the form of gatorade. If it’s a tangental friend who’s in a jam, you don’t need to do anything. You’re a hero, my man, and you should expect a six-pack by the weekend’s end. That said, any advice you could give as an area expert is cheap to you and more valuable than any towel.

4. Offer Your Guest A Towel

We *always* want a shower, and it’s a mildly weird thing to ask for. Offer a towel and you’re the best host ever. It takes no effort, and it’s awesome.

5. Go About Your Business

Generally, as a host, you’ve already fulfilled your biggest duty: you supplied housing. The other stuff to provide is beer, some breakfast and a towel: one of three is standard, two of three is great, and three of three is heroic. Beyond that, relax! Your guest knows what to do. They’ll figure everything out, and you can comfort yourself: you were a good pal and productive, all while sleeping. Not a bad deal, really. Plus, you’ll have a new friend who’s house you can crash at next time.

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